// syntax-hipster.js
// Install: npm install syntax-hipster

const syntaxHipster = require('syntax-hipster');

// Example: Format a JavaScript function randomly
const originalCode = `
function calculateTotal(items, taxRate) {
    let subtotal = 0;
    for (let i = 0; i < items.length; i++) {
        subtotal += items[i].price * items[i].quantity;
    }
    return subtotal + (subtotal * taxRate);
}
`;

// Randomize formatting with one call
const randomizedCode = syntaxHipster.randomize(originalCode, {
    language: 'javascript',
    chaosLevel: 'medium', // low, medium, high, or extreme
    preserveFunctionality: true
});

console.log(randomizedCode);

/*
Possible output (different every time):
function calculateTotal(items,taxRate){
    let subtotal=0;
    for(let i=0;i
  ✓ Copy to Clipboard

The Great Developer Time-Sink

Let's be honest: code formatting debates are the developer equivalent of arguing about whether pineapple belongs on pizza. Except instead of just ruining dinner, these arguments ruin productivity, team morale, and occasionally friendships. We've all been there: you submit a pull request, and instead of feedback about your algorithm's efficiency or your architecture's elegance, you get "Can we use tabs instead of spaces?" followed by a 47-message thread that ends with someone threatening to rewrite the entire codebase in Rust.

The absurdity reaches peak performance when you realize most of these debates are about completely subjective preferences that have zero impact on whether the code actually works. Your application doesn't care if you use semicolons. The user doesn't know whether you prefer single quotes. The server doesn't crash because you used trailing commas. Yet we treat these preferences like religious dogma, complete with holy wars and heretics.

My favorite example? The team that spent two sprint planning meetings debating quote styles while their authentication system had a security vulnerability that would have let anyone log in as admin. Priorities, people! It's like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic while arguing about whether the chairs should be arranged clockwise or counter-clockwise.

The Solution: Embrace the Chaos

After watching one too many teams descend into formatting-induced madness, I had an epiphany: if we can't agree on rules, why not eliminate the rules entirely? Instead of trying to find the One True Style Guide™, let's make formatting truly random and unpredictable. Enter Syntax Hipster, the tool that solves code style debates by making them literally impossible to have.

Here's how it works: every time you save a file, Syntax Hipster randomly applies different formatting rules. Sometimes you get semicolons. Sometimes you don't. Sometimes single quotes, sometimes double quotes. Tabs? Spaces? Why not both? In the same file! It's like having a formatting slot machine that pays out in developer confusion.

The beauty of this approach is that it forces developers to focus on what actually matters: the logic and functionality of the code. When formatting becomes unpredictable, you stop caring about it. It's the ultimate Zen approach to code style: by embracing chaos, you achieve peace. Plus, it makes your codebase look like it was written by a committee of cats walking on keyboards, which is honestly more interesting than most corporate codebases.

I built Syntax Hipster not just as a joke (though it is hilarious), but as a legitimate solution to a real problem. When formatting becomes random, teams stop wasting time on debates and start focusing on building things that work. It's the nuclear option for ending style wars.

How to Use Syntax Hipster

Getting started with Syntax Hipster is beautifully simple, much like the chaos it creates. First, install it:

npm install syntax-hipster --save-dev
# or
yarn add syntax-hipster --dev

Then, add it to your build process or set it up as a pre-commit hook. The basic configuration looks like this:

const { randomizeSyntax } = require('syntax-hipster');

// Apply random formatting to all .js files in src/
randomizeSyntax({
  directory: './src',
  extensions: ['.js', '.ts', '.jsx'],
  debates: ['semicolons', 'quotes', 'tabs-vs-spaces'],
  chaosLevel: 'maximum' // 'minimum', 'medium', or 'maximum'
});

Check out the full source code on GitHub for more configuration options and examples. The core randomization logic is surprisingly elegant in its simplicity:

function applyRandomFormatting(code) {
  const rules = {
    semicolons: Math.random() > 0.5,
    quotes: Math.random() > 0.5 ? 'single' : 'double',
    indent: Math.random() > 0.5 ? 'tabs' : 'spaces',
    trailingCommas: Math.random() > 0.5
  };
  
  return transformCode(code, rules);
}

Key Features That Make Chaos Beautiful

• Randomly applies different code style rules on each save: No two saves are alike! Your code becomes a unique snowflake every time.
• Can be configured to target specific style debates: Only want to randomize semicolons? Go for it. Want to include the great tabs vs spaces war? We've got you covered.
• Generates a 'style report' showing which hipster rules were applied: Get a beautiful report showing exactly how chaotic your code became. Perfect for bragging rights.
• Option to sync randomness across team for 'coordinated chaos': The entire team gets the same random rules for a day, creating beautiful consistency in inconsistency.

The Zen of Chaotic Formatting

Syntax Hipster isn't just a tool—it's a philosophy. By embracing randomness, we free ourselves from the tyranny of subjective preferences. We stop wasting time on debates that don't matter and start focusing on what does: building software that works.

The next time someone tries to start a debate about code style, just smile and say "It's handled." Then watch as Syntax Hipster turns their carefully formatted code into a beautiful, chaotic masterpiece. Your team will thank you (eventually, maybe after some therapy).

Ready to end the style wars forever? Try Syntax Hipster today. Your code will never be boring again, and neither will your standup meetings when you explain why yesterday's formatting is today's legacy code.

Remember: in the great formatting debate, the only winning move is not to play. Or to play randomly. Same difference.